He’s made it clear…..He’s shown you exactly who he is.
He doesn’t love you.
His heart and emotions are buried deep, not lost, just hidden, because he wants to keep them.
He keeps you close, not out-of-love, but for convenience, to keep himself from the lonely, desolate hell of validation.
He barely communicates.
I became the option you kept,
I was never your choice, only the place you returned when everything else failed.
not the person you’d fight for.
I waited for you,
I stayed when it was hard,
I gave when there was nothing left to give,
and you treated it
like it was always there,
like it was never special.
Now I see,
love shouldn’t feel optional,
and my heart
deserves more than leftovers.
He can’t show up for you, doesn’t see you or what you deserve.
And yet you keep hoping, hoping that one day he’ll wake up and see and choose you.
The one all along.
When you never have something, you become obsessed by it – you chase love, because you have never been loved by a man.
There will be men who want you, and there will be a man who deserves you. You can tell the difference by how they make you feel, not by what they say.
The ones who just *want* you…
they’ll show up when it’s convenient for them, when they’re bored or lonely, when they’re looking for validation, but disappear when you need something real. They’ll tell you what you want to hear, promise you the world, but their actions won’t match their words. They’ll be inconsistent, uncertain, and flaky, and when things get hard, they’ll walk away without hesitation. They want you because you’re a momentary desire, a temporary fix, not someone they’re ready to invest in.
But the one who *deserves* you… he’ll show up every single day, not because he has to, but because he wants to.
He’ll see you, truly see you….your heart, your soul, your worth….and he’ll respect you enough to put in the effort.
He won’t make excuses for why he can’t be there for you.
He’ll find a way, even when life gets busy or complicated.
He’ll choose you, every day, because he understands that love is more than just a feeling… it’s a commitment, a decision.
The man who deserves you will make you feel valued.
He’ll listen to your needs and meet them.
He’ll fight for you, not because he’s afraid of losing you, but because he knows your worth and isn’t willing to let go of something as rare as your love.
He’ll cherish you, not just when things are easy, but especially when they’re hard, because he knows that the strength of a relationship is built on more than just good times….it’s built on loyalty, respect, and effort.
Don’t settle for someone who just wants you.
Don’t mistake empty promises for love.
There will always be men who want you…who are drawn to your beauty, your spirit, your energy….but that doesn’t mean they’re worthy of your time, your trust, your heart.
When you find the one who deserves you, you’ll know. Not because of grand gestures or flowery words, but because his actions will prove that he sees you for everything you are and wants to build with you, not just take from you.
Know the difference.
Don’t confuse a man’s desire for you with the depth of a man’s love.
You are worth more than being someone’s “maybe.”
You are worth being someone’s forever.
Don’t lower your standards to keep anyone. Make them meet you at your level.
Self-respect is power.
The monster you saw at the end of the relationship is exactly who they are.
Don’t fool yourself into thinking that the person you fell in love with was the real them, and the one who hurt you was just a façade. No, the truth is, the mask came off at the end, and you finally saw their true colours.
The anger, the resentment, the hurtful words and actions – that’s who they are when they’re not getting what they want. That’s who they are when they’re forced to confront their own flaws and weaknesses.
And that’s who they are when they’re not hiding behind the charm and charisma that initially drew you in.
It’s hard to accept, especially when you’ve invested so much of yourself in the relationship.
But trust me, the monster you saw at the end is the real deal.
And you’re better off without him.
This book joyfully explores the hard science, societal myths, and effective communication in relationships, equipping you with the tools to live your best life.
We’re adjusting our unicorn horns and giving ourselves a generous dose of vibrant love!
Uncover the true essence of love free from compromise or societal pressures, even if past heartaches linger in your thoughts.
If I am not your first choice, please don’t waste my time.
There’s a quiet kind of heartbreak that doesn’t come with tears or loud goodbyes.
Don’t chase me if I’m not the one you truly want to be with.
Don’t play games.
Don’t love me in halves.
If I am not your first choice, don’t encourage me to share myself with you.
Don’t let me open up to you about my past, my childhood, my fears.
Don’t let me reveal my soul to you if you’re not ready to nurture it.
Don’t ask for a place in my heart if you’re not planning on staying there.
Don’t awaken my love if you’re not ready to love me.
Don’t hold me if you’ll easily let me go.
If I am not your first choice, don’t stop me from finding the one who would put me first.
Don’t lie to me and tell me that I’m the only one when you’re still juggling options.
It is okay to not know what you want, but please, if that is the case just let me go.
If I am not your first choice, please leave.
Leave and don’t disturb my peace. And never come back when you can’t fill your void.
Leave instead of half-loving me. Leave instead of lying to me.
Leave because I don’t need this kind of darkened hope in my life.
Leave before I get hurt enough to leave you.
Leave before you leave a mark.
Leave, because I can’t keep sharing my world with you if you’re distracted.
If I am not your first choice, please leave.
Because I’m the kind of person who pours when I love, who cares more than most.
I am the kind of person who believes in rare connections.
I’m the kind of person who will write you love letters, and make sure that you know you’re enough when you doubt the way your heart beats.
I’m the kind of person who will give you every part of me, but I need you to meet me there.
You can’t meet me half-way.
You can’t ask me to quiet the way I love.
You can’t ask me to settle for an almost.
I’m the kind of person who wants all or nothing, who believes that a person’s love isn’t rare if everyone gets it, and I won’t settle until I find someone who is ready.
I won’t settle until I find someone who is not afraid to choose me.
It comes with silence. With waiting. With wondering.
It’s the kind of heartbreak you feel when you realize — you were never a priority.
Just an option.
A maybe. A convenient “when I have time.”
And the worst part? You saw the signs. You just hoped you were wrong.
I’ve been there more than I want to admit. The unanswered messages. The late replies.
The moments when I gave so much of myself, only to get scraps in return.
It’s not always cruel, either. Sometimes they’re kind. They smile. They say all the right things.
But somehow, you still end up feeling like a guest in a space you so badly wanted to call home.
Being an option feels like sitting on the bench, waiting for your name to be called — but deep down knowing the game is already being played without you.
You start to question everything:
Am I not enough? Too much? Too available? Too easy to forget?
But here’s the truth I’ve come to learn, slowly and painfully:
Being an option in someone’s life doesn’t mean you’re not worthy.
It means they don’t know how to value what you bring.
Let’s chat about those whimsical dreams and illusions that need a one-way ticket to Bye-Bye Land!
Sure, tearing them down might stir up a storm, but clinging to them is like trying to fly with cement shoes.
Some dreams are shiny nuggets of hope; others, well, they’re last week’s leftovers, dragging us back.
It’s time for a farewell fiesta, where we bid adieu to the dreams that cramp our style.
Pen those release letters to past loves and outdated ideals!
When relationships nosedive, hearts crave a little TLC. Enter Lynette Stein, your guide from lonely-ville to love-town, with a life bursting with purpose. Life’s no fairy tale, and sometimes it feels like the scales are rigged, breeding resentment toward the world—or even ourselves.
Remember, healing and self-punishment don’t mix!
And maybe it’s not about them at all.
Maybe it’s about me — about how I’ve allowed myself to be placed on hold, on standby, in case of loneliness.
Maybe the real shift begins when I stop trying to prove myself to people who only look my way when it’s convenient.
I don’t want to be someone’s almost.
I don’t want to be their fallback, their “just in case,” their emotional safety net.
I want to be chosen with intention.
With clarity. With the kind of energy that says, “I see you — and I want you here.”
So if you’re reading this and it sounds like your story too, I hope you find the courage to walk away from anyone who makes you feel replaceable.
Because you’re not.
You’re not an option.
You’re a whole person.
And you deserve to be met with the same energy you give away so freely.
Choose yourself. Every single time.
So, embrace the exhilarating journey ahead! Blaze a new trail and shake things up. Be unapologetically, fabulously you. Celebrate what ignites your passion and release what holds you back. Let your inner compass steer the ship—after all, you’re the captain!
I love you, xo,
